A New Walk - Chapter 16

Ahlaaaan ❤️ Another long chapter! I've been trying to write bas my mind has been blank, inshallah this post lives up to your expectations, I tried to squeez in some ideas! Enjoooy xx

 (Please do ignore any spelling mistakes in this post auto-correct wasn't working) 

"Intay imshay ma3ay bara wana afahmich.."

I followed him out to the garden no one was there luckily we sat in a two seated chair minutes passed of us enjoying comfy silence ma3ina I knew I shouldn't be with him ghala6 ili ga3da asawi he's not my husband anymore...

Aziz:"walahtay 3alay?" He broke out the silence.

I smiled out the question, lu bagoul? 

Bagoul wayeeeeeeed, 

How I'd still check your whats app avatar and status from my phone if it was all that I could do. 

How I take the long way to go to university 3ashan amur 3ala your house to check if your car is there.

Shloun kint a7awil asa7ib ay khabar 3anik min ay a7ad y3arfik.

How my skin crawls at the mention of any Dana....

How I keep hearing "weee eyeech ilni9eeb ili a7san mina" and I'd nearly spit out the fact that; bas ana mabi a7san mina, abi Aziz.

Shloun I still kept our pictures hidden in my drawer between papers when my mother took them away.

Sooooo much to say yet, smiling out the question was all I had.

Aziz:"soulfay"

Me:"shagoul ma 3indi suwalif, inta gilt bitfahimni inik ma tizawajt.." I risked tilting to face him on the chair.

Aziz:"ana bil awrag w 3ind ahali mitzawij, bas la adri 3an Dana wala tadri 3ani Haya wallah a7liflich, min il milcha wana msafir tawni raad ams si2lay Yousif wala Hessa, hatha itha yadroun, bas amasheelha ma3ash w ga3da bil bait t3azim b rfeejat'ha w tsawi 7aflat..."

Me:"haman ya3ni mitzawij Aziz"

I got up feeling my throat nearly catch on fire and my eyes welling up with tears, he pulled my hand straddling me back onto his lap "GI3DAY BAFAHMICH" he whinnied, "AZIZ WAKHIR GHALA6 ASASAN INIK GA3AD MA3AY" I jummped up, as much as I wanted to stay there and hug the ribs out of him.

Aziz:"sorry wallah sorry 7agich 3alay ana ili ghal6an yuba, bas gi3day.." 

I sat back down next to him and swallowed my tears, god he could make me do anything with his voice. 

Aziz:"shloun your professor il German? mashalich il project" he smirked 

Me:"shdarak?"

Aziz:"ana mitwa9i6lich 3inda, 7afidh your weekly schedule itha tabeen ba3ad"

My mood lightened up a bit ma3a il suwalif and his lame jokes ❤️

Suddenly 9out faj2a came from inside it was probably Hessa "ILI BARA YDISH PLEASEE"

I got up quickly w dakhlna, almost reaching the door "9abir 9abir shinu raqmich il yideed" he whispered "adizlik what's app mina" he flashed his smile and followed me inside.

Fajer:"wai Haya wainich ga6aitay telephonich w thalaftay ta2akhar ilwagt binrid"

Me:"yallah 3ayal goumay"

The whole ride home not one song didn't link to him, how did I ever think I'd just forget him? he gave me so much to remember.

—————

Next morning came along all night I was hesitant whether to send him or not, he's married I kept reminding my self, bas ma y7ibha my other half kept reminding me.

All she's done is taken him for granted that's what she wanted. 3indaha ta7adi ina she can marry him with everybody rather than actual love towards Aziz.

The week went on 3adi the usual; university, back home, gym, home again.

Untill that one Monday night I couldn't just brush off my feelings like every.single.day. 

I've done it for so long I can almost turn on and off my feelings, I literally lost intrest in everything but him, but something even about feeling sad over him was pleasurable the fact that I'm not numbed out is pleasurable.

6ala3t telephoni w dazaitla what was the worst that could happen 9a7? 

Yemkin 325628 times I type it in and delete it, I type it in again and delete it...

"Goodnight, Aziz hatha raqmi (Haya) I forget about the other day tawni at'thakar I promised you about giving you my number." 

I sent him and threw the phone away from me bsir3a I walked around the room nervously, shakuuu I sent hiiim I felt so stupiiidd. I knew it was wrong. Wai typical. 

A notification beeped from my phone....

My heart skipped a beat w 7asait this stomach knots kicking back again

"Haan 3alaich you forgot this easily :p?"

We talked all morning about everything but nothing to do with us, lain 9aar 6 am and I needed to get ready 7ag my morning class.

Wi9alt university my eyes seeming to want to fall out of place, I really didn't have time to do put on makeup. Large sunglasses will save...

The class seemed to go slower than ever and I checked on Aziz he probably slept, 3ala ma khala9 il class ila ana 6al3a rou7i and 9uda3 mu 6abee3i yani..

Weeks passed 

3ala youm I went out to maki il ba7ar with the girls after class

Hessa:"Haya hathi Dana murt Aziz?" She closely said.

Murt Aziz made me cringe from the inside.

I looked up and it was, 

7agart'ha and kept on ma3a il suwalif w kalait...

Me:"la tiltaftain 3alaiha khal twali"

Hessa:"Haya 6a3ay minu hatha minu ili maska eeda chithi 7asha bi6eer minha"

I looked up again to see...it was...